Slug and Lettuce
Do you have a £300 mobile phone and nothing at all to say? If so, the Slug and Lettuce wants YOU! As part of basic training, you will learn to order champagne using only hand gestures and a combination of arrogant snorts; how to stand to show off your shiny new shoes; and the importance of casually mentioning your salary will be drilled into you at every opportunity. A lot of our recruits have gone on to be mugged on the way home, with many additionally being beaten up and spat upon like the nouveau riche vermin they are. To receive an information pack, call free on 0800-1-AM-ANN0Y1NG, or simply whine at the bar for details.
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