Playing at Personalities
What our computer games say about us
Feature
They say dog owners look like their dogs. Well, considering we can literally live virtual lives through our game consoles, Itchy wondered if the same is true for computer games.
Howdy Partner
There's no shame in it. It can easily happen. You've got the bathroom spray in one hand, you're stood in front of the mirror about to give it a clean, then suddenly and for no apparent reason you do what feels natural. You draw. You fire off your 'six shooter', then twirl the squeezy bottle round your finger a few times before hanging it smartly off your belt.
Oh yeah! It's cool to be a cowboy. You deserve a bit of Red Dead Redemption action.
Let's Kill Something
Do you ever see a helicopter or plane in the sky and actually take aim? Or imagine looking down the sight of a sniper rifle at an unsuspecting passer by thinking, 'I could make that shot. Just got to adjust for the wind...' If a grenade in the face is nothing more to you than a flesh wound and a casualty list just a way of identifying the lazy, perhaps you've played too much Call of Duty.
If you've never played it before, you probably need help.
Rock Rocks
Do you have no shame? Do you have way too much time on your hands? Do you dream of being in a band but have no musical talent whatsoever? Do you believe that groupies will love you if you can play a plastic guitar?
In that case, you need Guitar Hero.
Open a Can of Whoop Ass
Have you ever passed one of those gym freaks on the street, you know, the ones with muscles on their muscles, and thought, 'I could have him. Quick left jab, then a right, and he's going down'? Well, small word of advice, he probably won't go down and it's best not to give it a go. In real life fights are rarely like the movies.
But if you do insist, UFC Undisputed is undisputedly the game for you.
It's a Funny Old Game
Do you bear a grudge? Do you take things way too seriously? Do you still find it hard to forgive Pearce, Waddle and Southgate for those penalty misses against you know who? Do you still consider the greatest day of your life to be the 1st September 2001 when England destroyed you know who 5 - 1?
Not only do you need to chill, but you probably need to get your FIFA fix.
